keptherwaiting | 1948, Philadelphia

1948, Philadelphia

Jasper stares across the street at the flower store and thinks: It’s stupid, right?

The idea of buying Alice flowers, giving them to her, and having her - what? Be happy about them?

He thinks of the one time he tried to give a flower to Maria:

It’d been stupid. Him standing there and holding out the flower to her like some stupid human kid. Just plucked from the vase it’d been left in on the nightstand from the home’s previous but newly deceased owners. Thank God Lucy and Nettie hadn’t been there to see, though he thinks Maria may have told them later because Nettie had looked at him with pity the next day.

He shakes himself from the memory and watches a man leave the store with an entire bouquet, he’s smiling and so fucking human, and Jasper wants that. To buy a bunch of stupid flowers, smiling, and gift them to Alice.

But - It’s stupid, right?

He feels Alice squeeze his hand, only vaguely heard her approach - which, also stupid, as he shouldn’t be getting distracted like that - and he turns his attention back to her.

“They have the book?” he asks.

He’d been waiting outside, too uncomfortable with the tight confined spaces of the busier shops, even with Alice distracting him from his thirst when need be.

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Her smile is excruciatingly bright as she looks over at him and grabs his hand. "Rainy days will forever be my favorite now."

Once they're out of the city itself, Alice speeds up a little, getting them away from the limits and to the forested area she'd talked about. It's not the biggest of forests, but it's big enough.

Pulling off into a clear area, Alice throws the gear into park and looks out the window. "Okay. There are deer here--less carnivore prey, but we might see a bear or two? They taste better, but of course there's not going to be that many of them in a populous area."

She looks nervous, chewing on her lip as she squeezes his hand. "It's probably not the greatest first date--eating food you probably won't like."

Jasper turns more toward her after they’ve parked, when she reaches over to squeeze his hand.

“I should probably warn you - I don’t know how I’ll react.”

Her sudden nervousness is making him nervous too. He’s never tried to hunt animals before. Never even considered it a possibility. Their blood certainly doesn’t smell the same. Has she already seen something happening?

“When I hunt humans, I - Well, i suppose you know how it is. You’ve alluded to it enough. I just don’t want you to - if I seem off - If you’re uncomfortable at all, please don’t hesitate to leave me behind.”

Not that he wants her to leave him for good, hastily adding: “We could always meet again, at the car?”

"No."

It's quick, soft, accompanied with a shake of her head. Alice tucks a wayward curl behind her ear, watching him. "No, I had to figure this all out on my own. I don't want it to be the same for you. I'll be there, beside you, as long as you want me there."

Please, please want her there.

"You shouldn't...when I've seen us hunting before, in the little flashes of the grand scheme of our lives, you seem unaffected by the animal deaths. I imagine it's because they don't really have...emotions that you can pick up on. We'll try it--get at least enough in you to not be hungry for a few days. I just know you won't enjoy the taste as much. I mean, how could we?"

She shoots him a little, embarrassed smile, her thumb stroking over the back of his hand. "But I have faith in you, in your ability to make this work. I don't want you to hurt anymore."

“I won’t say no to your company.”

He is concerned as to what she might see but then she’s clearly seen it already?

“If you’re sure.”

He’s never had someone believe in him so strongly. More than Peter, who came back for him, and certainly more than Maria, who knew his use but hadn’t always trusted him in everything.

Jasper squeezes Alice’s hand in his, offering a brave smile.

“I suppose, then - lead the way?”

He’s only a little apprehensive now, mostly at the thought of the taste, as she keeps mentioning it.

But, it can’t be that bad, can it?

They leave the car and make their way into the woods, silent, listening. She can hear the chitter of squirrels and the warbling of birds, but she focuses past that, listening for sounds deeper in the woods.

"A herd of deer," she whispers, shooting Jasper a quick grin, grabbing his hand and darting off towards the sound.

They take down an antlered stag and a good sized doe in seconds, and Alice finishes her deer off quickly and neatly, not a drop of blood on her blue dress, but she stays crouched, to keep an eye on Jasper, make sure he's okay.

The hunting part had been fun enough. It always is, when having to give chase, using their enhanced senses like they should.

Approaching the kill like he would a human - quick and drinking deeply to avoid any of the emotions that might take hold - had probably not been the best idea, though.

It doesn’t smell right, and definitely doesn’t taste right.

It’s just not right. At all.

He’s coughing up the blood almost as soon as he pulls back from the stag, vomiting up as much of it as he can.

He really hopes Alice isn’t watching him, but a quick glance in her direction assured him she is and he turns away with a grimace once more.

And then he’s throwing up again.

His clothes are not saved from the mess.

Well, that could have been better.

Alice turns her head away, more for his privacy than for her. She's not disgusted, she's just sympathetic. Standing up, she moves over to him, rubbing his back in a gentle motion.

"I'm so sorry, Jasper," she whispers, combing her fingers through his hair. "I'm sorry, I didn't know that would happen--"

Jasper is downright embarrassed. A feeling he’s not used to. He wishes Alice hadn’t been here to see this.

He thinks to move away from her hand at his back, in his curls - he shouldn’t show such weakness - but he finds himself moving into the touch instead.

“Sorry,” he rasps. “I didn’t know it’d be that disgusting.”

He glances at her in her perfect, pretty blue dress then, and grimaces once more.

“Don’t - I don’t want you to ruin your dress.”

He’s made quite the mess.

“Have you ever - ?”

But no. He shakes his head at his own question. He can’t imagine it of her. Puking up stag blood like this.

God.

He’s so embarrassed.

It’s just blood. He should’ve been able to take it.

Alice hums softly as she crouches beside him, her hand still smoothing back his hair. She may love the clothes and shoes and accouterments of being human, but they're not important right now.

Never will be as important as the man beside her.

"Not animal blood," Alice murmurs, her hand slowing to a stop in his hair while she thinks about it. "But I made a mistake a few years after I'd started trying my hardest with this diet. I mean--I made a few mistakes but this one..."

Gently, she starts carding her hand through his hair again. "It's the best taste in the world to us and I vomited it all back up one night. I suppose it was more the reaction I had to killing someone who was barely out of childhood. But still--I killed a kid and I wasted his death. What was the point of that? Sometimes I think I did it to give me something to beat myself up with later."

Alice shakes her head, out of the depressing reverie. "I have spare clothes back in the car, for later. So don't worry about it. Don't beat yourself up over it, it's not a great taste. I promise though, carnivores taste a lot better...and other than the vomiting, you didn't have to feel the animal die like a person, right?"

Jasper shakes his head, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. She’s being so careful with him, and he’s never felt such tenderness before. He‘s not sure deserves it, only that he wants to be the sort of man to for her?

“No, it’s - different. I can still feel them, but it’s different.”

He finally manages to face her. He’s sure he looks awful. His clothes are ruined and he’s certain there are stains around his mouth from all the blood he’d coughed up.

He takes her in, his expression somewhat sad as he considers her. Maybe he’s too hopeless for her. Too wrong? The way she talks about her mistake - He can only imagine how she must have felt the day she killed that boy, and he’s felt it too, certainly, has grown tired of all the endless killing, and yet he’s only ever wanted more blood before.

”What if I can’t do this?” he asks in a whisper.

Alice licks her thumb, then uses it to start cleaning the blood off the corner of his mouth. She feels a stab of sadness for Jasper--the skittish way he seems to want to turn into her touches and turn away from them all at once.

She's not sure she can forgive the woman before her.

"Do you trust me?" Alice whispers back, moving to the other corner of his mouth. "I know it's a lot, asking a lot, when we met only days ago. But when I say that I know you can do this, because I've seen it and it's so clear and crisp and solid that I know it's going to happen, I need you to trust it. Trust me."

“I trust you,” Jasper says without even having to think about it.

Because he does trust her.

He knows a certain someone might think he’s being an idiot if she saw him now, but Alice is the most genuine person he’s ever met.

He looks into her bright golden eyes as she scrubs at his face. Her eyes had started to darken again, like his, but are now as bright as when he’d met her in the diner just a handful of days ago.

When she took his hand and he felt - everything.

“Think we can have a second chance at this first date thing?”

Alice smiles, her thumb grazing over his cheek, moving closer to press her lips against his cheek. "Of course."

She takes his face in both of her hands, tilting his head forward so she can press a kiss into his hair.

"If we got straws," she laughs, already rolling her eyes at her joke. "We could pretend we're sharing a shake like kids in town. I didn't even want to finish that joke, it's so bad."

Jasper bursts out laughing. Its an honest, genuine reaction. Just like his trust in her.

It’s not that her joke is funny, it’s terrible.

“ - Alice, that’s disgusting.”

"It made you laugh, though--" Alice beams, his hands still on his face as she dips forward to kiss his cheeks again. "And so that is all that matters, no matter how disgusting my joke was."

“Don’t know if I’ll be able to get that image out of my head.”

It doesn’t, however, ruin his appetite.

“I think I could try again?”

"We can look for the bears?" Alice stands, her hand reaching out for his to take. "They've got to be here somewhere--I know I saw one before you got here."

But the bears tend to fight back and more importantly: ruin clothes. She doesn't like to ruin her clothes. She's somehow managed to stay completely unbloodied, even in crouching by Jasper's side.

"Probably toward those rocks that way," she points, towards a thicket of trees. "There's probably a cave."

“Are you - Do you want to wait here?”

Jasper rather appreciates how sweet and patient she’s been with him but he doesn’t exactly want her to see it another time if he’s about to have the same reaction.

“I’ll come back, right after,” he adds hurriedly, in case she thinks he’s not planning to do so. “And then we can have ourselves a real date? Or, ‘least figure out what a real date is for us.”

“Okay,” Alice smiles. “Hold your breath, it might make the taste less weird.”

Maybe.

“I’ll be here, waiting for you.”

Jasper lingers for a moment, wanting to kiss her (and also not because he just puked up a bunch of blood in front of her).

He kisses her forehead.

“Be right back,” he murmurs before he’s off in the direction she’d indicated.

She can probably hear it: when he finds the bear, the ensuing fight, the quiet that follows.

And then he’s coming back to her, not quite grinning but pleased.

She’ll see his eyes are gold.

She’s perched on a rock, weaving daisies together that she’s picked in the time he was gone.

Alice looks up, fingers still working, before he appears, her grin bright. She sees his eyes before he even walks past the trees.

“Success?” She finishes weaving the daisies into a crown, hopping up from the rock to run over to him, tug him down and place the crown in his hair. “Better this time?”

Jasper laughs when she tugs him down to put the crown on his head.

“Success. I wouldn’t say it’s any better but I managed to keep it down. And I feel fed. Satisfied.”

He suddenly swoops her up into his arms, spinning her around.

She squeals, wrapping her arms around his shoulders to hold on.

Nothing but light—pure and sunny happiness—fills her. She loves this. Loves him. Can’t believe it’s only been days. It feels like she’s known him forever.

In a way, she has. But it feels like he’s known her too.

“I knew you could do it,” Alice beams, kissing his cheek.

Jasper doesn’t want to set her down so he just keeps holding her up, in his arm.

He’s so happy, and he feels the echo of that same happiness in her. Her love for him too.

“Thank you,” he murmurs. “For this, and everything.”

He feels far lighter than he has in years, especially after feeding. But, he’s felt lighter, ever since he met her too. He feels more whole, more complete, like he’d only been a half-something previously.

(And he knows all about mates, wonders if Alice is that, but he’s hesitant to think too much on it. Knows his hesitancy to do so is rooted in his past and his relationship with María.)

He hugs Alice to him again.

“I want to take you out. Somewhere nice. What do you want to do? Do you want to go dancing? We could go dancing.”

Combing her hands through his hair, careful not to disturb the crown of daisies, Alice presses a kiss to his forehead.

“We can go dancing,” she laughs, her fingers playing with the ends of his curls. “I’d like that, very much—can we stop at the hotel so I can change? I have clothes you can throw on in the car, though I’m going to make you change too if dancin’ is on the docket for tonight.”

She has fancy clothes for dancing, after all.

“Put me in what you want. Dancin’ is definitely on the docket.”

He knows she loves it.

He hugs and swings her around in his arms once more before he’s putting her feet back on the ground.

“C’mon. Race you back to the car.”

“Oh, you’ll win,” she laughs, already moving forward. “Your legs are twice as long as mine.”

Alice is fast, like all vampires, of course. But the length of Jasper’s legs definitely give him an advantage.

Or so she believes.

Regardless, she does take off toward the car, flitting through the trees and underbrush.

Jasper grins, and then darts after her. He quickly gains on her and is only waiting a few moments ahead of her at the car.

“You’re still pretty fast,” he compliments as he gifts her his daisy chain crown, putting it atop her head.

“The clothes in the back?”

Sighing, long-suffering and overly dramatic, Alice trudges to the trunk, popping it and digging around for a second before pulling out a shirt and some pants, neatly folded.

“If I could have one wish, it would be to be just a little taller,” Alice laughs, handing him the clothes before shutting the trunk. “Get changed, Mr. Whitlock. I have a date to get ready for.”

“Well, I like you just the way you are,” Jasper says, ducking to kiss the top of her head as he takes the clothes from her.

He changes quickly as requested. He’ll get rid of the old clothes once they’re back at the hotel, just stuffs them under the front seat as they climb into the car.

“I’m sure you know a place, for dancing?” he asks when they’re moving again, back toward town.

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1948, Philadelphia

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